with Melody van der Wallen, Principal Lawyer at Wallen Family Law

When couples separate, reaching an agreement can feel overwhelming — especially when emotions are high or communication has broken down.

Family law mediation offers a structured, private and cost-effective way to resolve parenting and property disputes without going to court.

Melody van der Wallen, Principal Lawyer at Wallen Family Law, says mediation is often the most productive first step. “It gives both people a voice and helps them shape their own outcome,” she explains. “That’s almost always better than having a judge make decisions for you.”

What Is Family Law Mediation?

Mediation is a voluntary process where an independent and accredited mediator helps the parties discuss their issues and reach agreement.

The mediator doesn’t take sides or make decisions. Their role is to facilitate calm, productive communication and guide the discussion toward practical solutions.

“Think of it as a structured conversation with a neutral person keeping it fair and focused,” Melody says. “You’re still in control of the outcome.”

How the Process Works

Each party attends the mediation — often with their lawyer — and talks through key issues such as parenting arrangements, property division or financial matters.

The mediator sets ground rules for respectful dialogue and ensures each person has an opportunity to speak.

Agreements reached in mediation can then be made legally binding through Consent Orders or a Binding Financial Agreement.

“We help our clients prepare thoroughly before mediation,” Melody explains. “That includes clarifying goals, gathering documents and planning how to communicate effectively. Preparation is what makes the difference”.

When Mediation Is Required

In most parenting cases, mediation is a legal requirement before applying to the Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia.

This step is known as Family Dispute Resolution (FDR). After attending FDR, the practitioner issues a Section 60I Certificate, confirming whether an attempt was made to resolve the matter.

“It’s not just a procedural box-tick,” Melody says. “It’s often the best opportunity to reach an outcome quickly and without the cost or stress of litigation.”

Benefits of Mediation

• Faster and less expensive than court proceedings

• Confidential and private

• Keeps decision-making in your hands

• Reduces conflict and preserves co-parenting relationships

• Encourages creative, tailored solutions

“When people reach an agreement through mediation, they’re far more likely to stick to it,” Melody explains. “That’s because it’s their agreement — not something imposed on them.”

When Mediation May Not Be Suitable

Mediation may not be appropriate in cases involving family violence, coercive control, or significant power imbalances.

In those situations, other processes such as lawyer-assisted negotiation, or court intervention may be safer and more effective.

“Our role is to assess which path gives our clients the best balance of safety, fairness and progress,” Melody says. “Mediation works beautifully when it’s used in the right circumstances.”

Quick Answers

What is family law mediation?
A voluntary, confidential process where a neutral mediator helps separating couples resolve disputes without going to court.

Is mediation the same as counselling?
No. Counselling focuses on emotional issues. Mediation focuses on practical solutions to legal and parenting matters.

Do I need a lawyer at mediation?
It’s not mandatory, but highly recommended. Your lawyer can help you prepare, keep discussions on track and formalise any agreement reached.

What if we can’t agree at mediation?
You’ll receive a Section 60I Certificate (in parenting cases), allowing you to apply to the Court if needed.

Can property matters also be mediated?
Yes. Mediation works for both parenting and financial matters and can save months of legal fees compared to litigation.

Do I have to be in the same room as my ex?
No. We conducted the majority of our mediations as a “shuttle mediation”. This means, the mediator moves between two rooms to facilitate the exchange of proposals.

From Melody

“Mediation gives people a chance to resolve conflict with dignity. It’s calm, private and empowering — and with the right preparation, it can turn a difficult separation into a manageable process.”

– Melody van der Wallen, Principal Lawyer, Wallen Family Law